The F Word (Part 3)

So we've talked about the first step to forgiveness--praying for the person. Now what?! Sometimes people ask, "Am I supposed to be best friends with them now, do I just forget what they've done, do I let them continue to hurt me?" And my answer is "No." There's a big difference between forgiving someone and condoning the behavior. You were called to be a disciple, not a doormat. You also were called to love, not loathe. In 1 Corinthians 13:6, it says love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

There are various levels of love depending on how deep the hurt is. Some relationships can be fixed just with simple communication. But with others it can be a long and difficult journey of getting through the pain (emotional or physical) that was inflicted upon them. Love comes in different forms. I don't know your situation, but hopefully you can relate to these. Maybe for you, you need to talk to the person face to face. Talk to them about how they've hurt you, but also let them know you forgive them. Maybe loving someone means not giving them the evil eye whenever you see them. It could be that you don't take your frustrations out on friends who are close to that person. Maybe it means walking away from another conflict with them. Or not bashing them over the head with a golf club (not that I've ever had that thought before). Maybe it's praying for them to turn their lives around.

It's not always an easy road. But if you take one step at a time, you'll be farther ahead and better off than if you just sit in the dirt and feel sorry for yourself.

Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. ~Ephesians 4:31-32